Julie shared with Kerrie the feeling of not belonging, and then finding a place of belonging and support.
Key number two to Adapting To Extraordinary Change – Find Peer Support.
We can learn so much from Julie’s stories – and have a laugh with her as she shares what happens when you’re learning skills in the kitchen – Cooking Without Looking – skills Julie has become known for, along with other interesting and inspiring things!
Listen below, on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or find more platforms here.
Kerrie Phipps 0:00
Okay, so Kerrie Phipps here back with Julie woods, author of How To Make A Silver Lining and her latest book, Julie?
Julie Woods 0:09
Why not – what a blind woman said to “Do you want to referee game a nude touch rugby” and more!
Kerrie Phipps 0:16
I love it! So you have so many great stories to share. And I really appreciate you having already shared about your key number one, in dealing with extraordinary change, which is so relevant for everybody now. And so you talked about asking for help and so moving on to key number two. Would you like to share with us about how you found a peer support?
Julie Woods 0:38
Yes. So when I went blind, it move me towards a group of people who are now like me. So before I went blind, I was partially sighted for 13 years Kerrie, and that was a really hard place to be because there was nice support. So I wasn’t surrounded by people who were like me and didn’t belong anywhere. I didn’t belong in the sighted world. And I didn’t belong in the blind world. So when I went blind, I finally got to move towards others who were like me. And that’s just such a huge relief and gives you a sense of belonging that feels like you’ve arrived at home when you’ve been in limbo for so long. I can’t. I can’t explain how great it felt to find other people who were like me. And that was at the Foundation for the Blind. So I met other blind people who couldn’t see, I met a blind men who had power eyes, I met a blind woman who could read with her fingers. I meet a blind man who ran marathons I mean, another blind woman who used a chainsaw. And I made a blind man who mowed his lawn with one shoe on and one shoe off. So all of a sudden I was meeting all these blind people who were doing the things that I thought I couldn’t. And that was really inspiring for me because it helped me see that. I was. I could do think the things that I thought I couldn’t before I didn’t think that I could, you know, use No, I haven’t used a chainsaw but every with my fingers or walk or half marathon, but when I saw other people that could do it. I thought maybe I could do some of those things.
Kerrie Phipps 2:25
Yeah, Julie, I remember you telling me years ago about that moment on the lounge. After you had said no, it was probably maybe it was your most significant or only no, before you decided to start saying “Why not?” And I don’t know if we’re skipping ahead here. But but there was something that you found that you could do.
Julie Woods 2:48
Yes, yes. No, I got. I got asked to go cross country skiing.
Kerrie Phipps 2:55
And you hadn’t been blind very long at that point
Julie Woods 2:57
No a couple of years and yeah. was, oh my goodness, I thought God, cross country skiing! Something might happen to me might fall over, you know, blah, blah, a bunch of blind people that’s a bit random. So I went home and I sat on the couch and I thought you stupid woman, what kind of blind person you’re going to make? You turn down opportunities that come your way. So I decided at that moment that I would no longer say no, but instead say why not? And if anyone asked me to do anything, I’d try it once. And yeah, you’re right Kerrie, it does fit in here because it was when you get asked something, those thoughts those limiting beliefs can flittering in through your mind and you think, Oh, no, I can’t do that. I can’t do that. And then if you learn just to say, why not well, you know, they disappear. And all of that, then, you know, the next minute you’re on this pathway and you’re doing whatever you said, why not to like learning to read with your fingers or learning to touch type, go for a walk around the block, whatever it is in watching other blind people do those things in saying why not really helped me?
Kerrie Phipps 4:12
Yeah, and I imagine you had that. I mean, you said watching other blind people do things, but you’re literally not watching as visual people would understand.
Julie Woods 4:20
Oh no.
Kerrie Phipps 4:21
But you had peer support in learning to ski.
Julie Woods 4:25
Yes, yeah, but I didn’t do that in the end Kerrie because I said “no”.
Kerrie Phipps 4:31
Oh, I see. Right. So it was everything after that where you started saying… Okay.
Julie Woods 4:35
Yeah I didn’t have didn’t go back and do that, no. So and I always say to people, I’ve never been asked to go cross country skiing again. So these things can really be once in a lifetime opportunities.
Kerrie Phipps 4:46
Yeah.
Julie Woods 4:47
So it really makes it even more important that you say why not.
Kerrie Phipps 4:50
Wow. Yeah. So I will, I think down the track, we’ll talk about some of the really incredible things that you’ve said yes to, but in the meantime, as we’re talking about finding peer support, you also gave peer support. And I would love to hear again. Actually, I’ve only read it in your book about I would love to hear your retelling of when you were learning to cook or supporting other blind people to cook and there you are in the kitchen. Some people have guide dogs and what was going on as you were…
Julie Woods 5:24
As I was doing that? So I had a friend called Olivia who was very, very bright young woman, the youngest of 17 and the Vietnamese family went blind at the age of 18 months through English measles, came to New Zealand and came to a Otago university to study law and history. She was exceptionally bright and she was in a college, a student college and they wanted to go flirting and she said to me, “Julie, can you teach me how to cook?” And I said, “Sure, why not come up to my kitchen and we’ll invite some blind people around and we’ll make a student meal like bangers and mash.”
Kerrie Phipps 6:05
Yeah.
Julie Woods 6:06
So she was in the kitchen and I was showing her how to peel a potato, which if you can imagine is quite difficult actually, to explain to a blind person how to peel a potato, and we put the sausages in the oven, and sort of half time I said, “Come out, and we’ll turn them over.” So she came out and I said, Look, you just get a fork and you put it underneath the sausage and you turn it over like that. Well, the fork got a bit stuck. So I ‘eeeeh’ a bit harder with the fork, and the sausage bounced over the floor, and all the guide dogs that were there scurried up and grabbed and the winner got the got the hot sausage. And of course you can imagine what happened next. ‘Blaaaaah’ The dog vomited the sausage onto the carpet floor because it was too hot. So It was, yeah, it was an interesting cooking without looking lesson. Shows you what happens when blind people try to be independent?
Kerrie Phipps 7:10
I can imagine the sound of all of those, all of those paws rushing across the floor.
Julie Woods 7:14
Yeah. You can hear their harnesses and their chains and their claws. Sorry doggies.
Kerrie Phipps 7:25
They move very quickly indeed. That’s fantastic. And so so did she move into an independent living space then?
Julie Woods 7:36
Yes, she did. She lived into? She moved into a variety of flats. I think she had five other flatmates at one time and now she’s got four children.
Kerrie Phipps 7:48
Wow, that’s amazing. That’s so beautiful.
Julie Woods 7:51
Yeah.
Kerrie Phipps 7:52
Yeah. So it really is a time to be finding peer support, offering peer support and and learning to do things differently. The first episode we talked about adapting. And yeah, there any other stories or tips that you’d like to share in relation to this?
Julie Woods 8:08
I think looking at the way other people do things, so it’s just finding people who are in a similar situation to you, and looking for the inspiration to do things in different ways. Because I think we can always learn to do things differently and be open minded to what it is we can do differently and looking at other people as a really great source of inspiration.
Kerrie Phipps 8:36
Hmm, absolutely, in so many ways. And I think, you know, back to the beginning, you said that you felt you felt this sense of belonging, you know, because with the blind community, you’re all in this together. And that very much is a sense of that in the world right now as everyone’s coming to terms with what COVID-19 means and. And globally, I think there is such a sense of we’re in this together, whether we’re staying home staying safe keeping other people safe, or we’re going out to work and being on the front lines. There’s such a sense of community, right across the world. And yeah, and I think so much inspiration to do things differently. And I think because of the path that you’ve walked, it’s been. How long has it been now? I remember.
Julie Woods 9:26
23 years.
Kerrie Phipps 9:27
I remember when we first connected you had just thrown your 10 years blind party.
Julie Woods 9:32
That’s right.
Kerrie Phipps 9:33
Yeah. And acknowledged all the people in your world at that time.
Julie Woods 9:37
Oh, that’s right. I’ve had a 15 years blind party, the 20 years blind celebration since then, so bring them on.
Kerrie Phipps 9:45
Yes. Okay, so should we wrap up there I want to keep these nice and short for people who are doing little walks, little exercise, you know, journeys out of their house or, or just, you know, fitting in a quick podcast every now and then. So that is beautiful. Thank you, Julie. And let’s come back with number three, very soon. Would you like to share what that is?
Julie Woods 10:09
Key number three will be – Write your own rules.
Kerrie Phipps 10:15
That sounds exciting. Okay. Thank you, Julie.
Julie Woods 10:18
Thank you, Kerrie.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
