Connecting with Patrick was easy – I overheard the name of his book in a conversation and had to know the author of The Connector’s Way! Patrick immediately puts people at ease and feeling welcomed and included. He’s a friend for life and I’m so happy to introduce him to you 😀
Find Patrick Here
theconnectorsway.com
The Connectors Way
Listen below, on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or find more platforms here.
Kerrie Phipps 0:00
Hi, Kerrie Phipps here connecting with confidence. I am really delighted to be connecting you today with Patrick Galvin. He’s the author of the connectors way, a story about building business one relationship at a time. I met Patrick in Singapore just over a year ago at the Asia professional speakers convention. Of course, we had so much to talk about, he loved the idea of my book, do talk to strangers, how to connect with anyone anywhere. And of course, I was in love with the connectors way. And it’s such a beautiful story. And I really have loved not just today’s conversation with Patrick, but also every conversation with him every interaction, I see what he’s doing on LinkedIn, he’s sharing fantastic little useful tips about connecting. He really is about building business, one relationship at a time and often people focused on one aspect over the other focusing on building business and can forget a little bit Little bit about the relationships as we go. So enjoy this episode. I look forward to hearing your comments.
Patrick Galvin 1:14
Everybody has certain natural advantages that will make them good relationship builders. You just need to be aware and encourage and focus on their strengths and they can build a tremendous network of connections.
Kerrie Phipps 1:29
Thank you, Patrick, for joining me for this conversation. every conversation with you is an absolute delight. I feel so uplifted, inspired, challenge motivated. I’m really thrilled that we can take some time just to have a conversation about connecting. You’re the author of the connectors way. I remember meeting you in Singapore, just over a year ago
Patrick Galvin 1:51
Hard to believe what a different world
Kerrie Phipps 1:54
Yeah. And I was just so delighted just to meet you and to see your book and something that I’ve been noticed recently, I guess, there’s no surprise because I saw this in you in the beginning, but I’ve seen you on LinkedIn, I’ve seen your sharing just little videos. And they’re so powerful because they’re super encouraging, but they’re very practically helpful in helping people shift into the focus of connecting meaningfully and generously. You want to tell me more about your thinking behind what you’ve been sharing.
Patrick Galvin 2:26
I think there are a lot of people who confuse connecting and networking. It’s not about going out and meeting as many people as you possibly can and hoping for the best. It’s really about taking your existing relationships and cultivating those as much as you possibly can. And I think a lot of times people think that they need to meet more people. And the reality is we have a lot of connections that we kind of let drift away. And actually some of those are some of the best people who want to connect with connecting and serving others really should go hand in hand. So what I’m doing with the videos what I Do in my own life is really look for ways to serve others without thinking how I’m going to benefit. That’s one of my seven rules for building business one relationship at a time. And it’s my favorite one, which is service, when you can equate connecting and serving others. That’s a really nice equation.
Kerrie Phipps 3:15
It is. And you know, it’s something that comes up as I share about this too, when we connect with an attitude of service, then we’re not nervous, we’re not worried about the outcome. We can just really be in the joy of the moment currently.
Patrick Galvin 3:29
Right? It’s a it’s a mindset. And when you stop thinking about, well, what am I going to get out of this relationship or this person? It becomes a lot more relaxing, a lot more fun. And the good news is things will come out of it. That’s just human nature. It’s reciprocity. There’s a American academic Robert Cialdini, who wrote a great book called influence. When we serve others. People want to serve us back. So if we can just divest ourselves of thinking, you know, what’s the quid pro quo and just do it because it’s the right thing to do. It’s a lot more fun to be You have service to others, and things will sort themselves out and come back to us. It’s really just a very pleasant way to live.
Kerrie Phipps 4:07
It is have you always felt like this? Yeah. How long have you been in business? Tell us a little bit of the background to this
Patrick Galvin 4:12
Been in business for almost 20 years with our existing company, which is a company that’s devoted to helping people grow through relationship. We’re a coaching enterprise. We’re doing a lot of E learning right now in this crazy new virtual world that we’re in. And it’s really the way I’m wired. And one of the things that I’ve had to do is really try to decode myself because what comes naturally to me does not come naturally to other people. And I’m not saying that to brag or to sound more important, but I I realized that there’s just different comfort levels that people have, you know, some people have a flair for it, just the joy of doing it. And I certainly put you in that camp or you’re one of the best connectors I’ve ever met in my life. I see you doing that the coding to and really helping people understand how they can lean into their skill set. We all have things to contribute and you don’t need to be an extrovert. You do such a great job of sharing that message with people, we all can be great connectors. It’s a mindset. First you and I naturally have it. But there’s also a skill set. And everybody has certain natural advantages that will make them good relationship builders, you just need to be aware and encouraged and focus on their strengths and they can build a tremendous network of connections.
Kerrie Phipps 5:25
Absolutely. And I really appreciate that you said it’s not about what the skill set can be learned. But what did you say it’s not about? So
Patrick Galvin 5:33
it’s a mindset. First, you have to, you know, say, Okay, this is going to be the way I want to roll in the world. I want to be a relationship builder. And once you have that as your starting point, then you can lean into the skills that you have, and you can go out and acquire the skills that will make you more effective in terms of building relationships.
Kerrie Phipps 5:51
Yeah, it’s not about whether you’re extrovert or introvert. It’s building that skill set. And I know coming back to this thing of service, it’s like you If we start with that, and that’s probably what I was most natural at, that’s what I grew up with. That was the, the vibe or the way of being you know, is look for opportunities to serve people, and you do find great joy in that. But certainly as a networker, or you know, as a business connector, I would feel very intimidated. So it very much is about building a skill set. And I think you know that coaching really supports you with questions that put other people at ease that help people do the best thinking, absolutely something that we can learn. But shifting our focus from what do I get from this to? How can I serve people? How can I help other people not feel nervous to feel welcome? Or to feel included? When we have that kind of focus? It just creates this flow and anything is possible.
Patrick Galvin 6:45
Agreed.
Kerrie Phipps 6:46
Yeah.
Patrick Galvin 6:46
Hundred percent.
Kerrie Phipps 6:48
Something else that I’ve noticed in your language is like your generosity of words. You’ve recently shared about doing testimonials for people without being asked you know, just getting in and surprising somebody In your network, somebody who you’ve seen is fantastic in their work committed to the community, just going there and share some generous words to tell the world you know how great that person is that also just makes their day dosn’t it.
Patrick Galvin 7:13
Yeah, absolutely. So how would you feel if you opened your inbox and you saw something from LinkedIn saying, Oh, your friend Jane has just recommended you. We didn’t ask Jane for recommendation, and you click it and you read this beautiful recommendation? Wouldn’t that lift your spirits? And how many of us have had that feeling? The truth about LinkedIn and a lot of people don’t realize is most recommendations that you see on that platform are there because somebody went out to their network and asked for the recommendation?
Kerrie Phipps 7:40
Yes.
Patrick Galvin 7:40
If you become the person who spontaneously recommends without being asked, it is incredible. The feedback that you’re going to get, and it doesn’t take a lot of time when you get good at writing a recommendation takes about five to 10 minutes and you don’t have to have it in perfect marketing speak. In fact, that would not help it wouldn’t sound authentic. Just reflect on that person. Why? Would you want to do business with them again? And again? And again? Why do you tell your friends about that person. And that’s the sort of thing you need to share in your recommendation, about 100 to 200 words is all you need for a really lovely recommendation. Once you start doing that, you’re going to get some great feedback from people. And it will be a reinforced action that you’re going to go back to doesn’t necessarily just have to be on LinkedIn, if you know a business owner, go out to Google and write a review for him. I mean, that is huge for a business owner or go onto Yelp, or whatever platform would be meaningful for that person. And you might even ask them, Hey, you know, where could you use a lift and social media? I want to put it where it’s going to be most helpful to you. Maybe it’s a Facebook review. I mean, wherever it is, it’s going to be different. And people aren’t going to be amazed, because how often does that happen? The folks who were watching I was having this conversation, how many people have done this for you without you’re asking for it? And I bet you it’s a handful in most cases and maybe none in many cases. Just think about it from that perspective. Boy, if that would mean that much to you wouldn’t mean a lot to the person that you’re doing it for. So why not give it a go?
Kerrie Phipps 9:08
Absolutely. You know, and it’s a part of LinkedIn that I haven’t used a lot. I’ve done maybe 20 recommendations and probably received about 20 recommendations. But last night, I did sit down to do a couple having seen you talk about this.
Patrick Galvin 9:26
That is fantastic.
Kerrie Phipps 9:28
And then I messaged the person that I was recommending, and I said, I’ve got a little surprise for you. But maybe you’d like to give me a hint as to how to do it best. And I said, I would love to write a recommendation for you, because I’ve seen the leadership that you’re demonstrating right now. You know, I’m just really grateful and just want to, you know, send you a virtual hug. But is there anything specific that you don’t see coming through that you’d like me to point out?
Patrick Galvin 9:51
What response did you get?
Kerrie Phipps 9:53
Oh, my gosh, she was blown away. And so she was grateful and said a couple of comments and I was like, Oh, absolutely. That that’s her. So when I said the recommendation through it wasn’t long before I got another message back just going, Oh my gosh, that’s amazing. Because I did I did add, you know, I’m pretty tired right now like it’s late. So please let me know if I can make that more succinct. It just completely made a day. That’s why it’s nice to make people stay and then Patrick, I, I think I was just about to go to bed and Lyndon said, Oh, somebody put a review on your, on your podcast. And I just said he read the name. And I was like, I didn’t I didn’t recognize that name. And it’s the most beautiful review on the apple podcast. I was like, the main thing I haven’t asked anybody for review. You know, and I know sometimes business leaders in a specific thing like in LinkedIn or, you know, various marketing, they’ll tell you, make sure you’re asking for, you know, like shares reviews. Make sure you’re sending people your website, making sure there’s all of these boxes ticked. You know, Patrick, I forget all the boxes. just opened up the conversation.
Patrick Galvin 11:02
That’s interesting. So the common advice is ask, ask ask. It’s not give, give give. backwards. I really do.
Kerrie Phipps 11:10
Yeah. And I just love hearing you say that because sometimes I’ve doubted myself because I hear everybody with their business skills, talking about how you have to do things. And I think ah, Patrick, honestly, I just want to love people. And it’s the people that I come across each day. I don’t know what they’re going through. I don’t know what word of encouragement might support and when I think of people in my world who really inspire me, it’s people who speak words of life. That’s what I wake up journaling about this morning. I was thinking of you I was thinking about many other friends who just, it’s their natural language. They’re speaking words of encouragement, they’re building you up. And it had such a powerful impact in my life, that I think it must have a powerful impact for others too.
Patrick Galvin 11:54
It absolutely does. It is the right thing to do if you want to live a full and whole life into Feeling like a good human being. But here’s the good news. It’s also really smart for business. And it comes back to you, when you start taking yourself out of well is this one going to be the one that I wrote a recommendation, it’s going to come back to me. Just don’t worry about it. When you go forward with this attitude and just are doing this things will spill back on you. And sometimes we more than you could possibly imagine.
Kerrie Phipps 12:22
I was just thinking, if you just give someone a tip at a restaurant, because they just made your day you walk out of there, you’re not expecting them to chase you down the street and say, Can I do business with you? You’re just giving. You know, if you say to the cafe owner, can I just pay for two coffees now so you can give one to someone later in the day. You’re not expecting anything to come back? And it’s like we have these moments of spontaneous generosity. But what if we build that into everyday? What if we look for opportunities to be generous?
Patrick Galvin 12:51
Yeah, and some people are doing it right now and others are really missing out. So in this age of pandemic, I’m in the States or in Australia, but this is a global thing. We have an opportunity to really strengthen relationships with people. I was on a podcast of two very successful female realtors in the States. And whenever I go on a podcast, I want to listen and hear you know what they’re talking about what their style is, and I had heard them on a podcast about a month before I went on complaining that they were busy getting on the phone talking to home buyers and sellers who they did work with in the past. Just touching base here, how are you managing Coronavirus houses affecting your family? Is it hard running your home school and your business? It’s just really kind of creating conversation, expressing empathy and seeing if they could maybe give them a tip and advice, introduce them to someone help them out. And they are super successful at what they do because their relationship builders and one of them complained and the other said the same thing was happening to her. They had not received a single phone call from a service provider touching base in the same way that they were touching base with their clientele. And I went on to the podcast I said, Hey, is that changed? Has anyone reached out and one of them said that one of her bankers had called her not because he heard the podcast, but because he was doing the right thing and said, Hey, Linda, how are you doing right now? How’s your family doing? They had a 10 minute conversation. So this banker was one of a multitude of bankers that she works with. And she got off that column to say, Honey, she turned to her husband, guess who we’re going to be banking a lot more with in the future. So the banker did the right thing. He connected on a human level, and it had an impact on her. And there are a lot of people like you and I who value that connection and relationship that people who provide us services can give us. And when they do that, we feel more loyalty to them. We want to do business with them. And she was going to be transferring a lot of money out of banks that just look at her as a transaction point and not as a human being. So you know, you do the right thing. And I think right now people will pick up the phone more or you can schedule a zoom call. You can do virtual coffees, and really just connect with people. Start looking at your LinkedIn connections or go through your other social media. platforms and look at people who you haven’t spoken with for a long time. This is a great opportunity to reach out and say, Hey, can we have a 15 minute conversation? Let’s catch up. I want to hear how you’re doing during this time of pandemic, and everyone’s going to say yes to 15 minutes and, you know, after 15 minutes say, hey, I’ve gone 15 I don’t want to overstay my welcome. If it’s a great conversation, they’re gonna want to keep talking to you.
Kerrie Phipps 15:24
Yeah, absolutely. Patrick, this is where we find ourselves. Now, I want to keep talking to you. Can we can we do a part two? Because I feel there’s so much more we can delve into in terms of how words have such power? Absolutely. Whether it’s whether it’s you know, getting better at the written word and sending little recommendations or reviews or little notes of encouragement, or whether it is in the way that we communicate because I know that it’s something that I’ve struggled with, I think all the you know, I feel like I admire someone so much, but then how do I put that into words and I think that’s something we could unpack a bit more in another episode.
Patrick Galvin 15:59
Fantastic I look forward to it.
Kerrie Phipps 16:02
Thank you so much, Patrick, have an awesome week.
Patrick Galvin 16:04
You too.
