One of the joys of speaking is knowing that your message has landed well, that you communicated what you wanted to, and that your message was heard. Knowing you’ve made a difference is a great reward. Regardless of your words, you generally want them to have the intended impact. And they do. Words are powerful. May our intended impact always be a positive one. (Pause and ponder) :)
Do Talk to Strangers – How to Connect with Anyone, Anywhere is the book I wrote to raise awareness of the joy of connecting with new people, to raise awareness of the possibilities that abound when we connect authentically, and with a servant-leadership spirit. It’s also a confidence-building book. When we’re excited about something, we’re naturally more confident. When we’ve done something many times, we continue to grow in confidence (unless we take it for granted). It matters that our confidence grows and that we acknowledge it and grow it, for the times when it really matters.
connecting with confidence matters in every sphere of life.
You need to be able to connect confidently with the friend you’re concerned about, who’s becoming distant and isolated.
You need confidence to connect with your boss when you see something going wrong in the organisation.
You need to connect confidently with your child, when you don’t know what’s going on in their world.
You need to be confident to connect with the teachers at your child’s school.
You need to be confident to connect with those you lead, those who look up to you, and those you look up to.
You need to be confident to connect with your customers. When you’re confident, when you hear them, they want to do business with you.
You need to be confident to be the best employer in town, to have the best staff on your team.
And if you can connect confidently with complete strangers, just to offer help, to ask for help or to learn something new, your life will be greatly enriched in countless ways.
Your confidence matters. it’s SO much bigger than you!
It’s been such a joy to be travelling and connecting with people of so many different cultures since writing this book, and especially in the last few months. (In Brunei, Singapore, Malaysia, the Philippines, and Australia of course) This only heightens my awareness of the importance of the words I’ve poured from my heart into the pages of Do Talk to Strangers – How to Connect with Anyone, Anywhere. Strangers could be someone whose culture is strange to you (not just nationality – there’s cultures in workplaces, teams and families – just ask anyone with in-laws) or they could simply be someone who looks like someone you know but you haven’t met yet. Please look for an opportunity to say hello :)
Where are you on the scale of “I don’t want to talk to strangers at all” to “Strangers – yes please! I love meeting people!”? And what would be your reasons to? I know many people stretch themselves to connect for the sake of growing their business, or growing a circle of friends for their childrens sake, and these are valid reasons. The best reason I find though, if you really want to connect confidently, is to serve others. Think ‘random acts of kindness’. We all love the stories, hearing what’s happened when someone turned up and changed someone’s world. We don’t realise how easily we can be a part of these little miracles. When you can relax and be yourself, let go of pretense and image, (being focused on others makes this a million times easier) you can see ways to make someone smile, or to help in many little ways. You can be the world-changer.
I was inspired to write all of this after I saw this post, which followed a recent speaking engagement in the Philippines. I thought about how beautiful the Filipino’s are, and how so many of them love the #DoTalkToStrangers message because they’re a little shy. In my experience, they are the most welcoming, hospitable, generous, encouraging and kind people – the type of people the world really needs right now. So it matters that these kind of people are free to be confident and express themselves. These words just inspired me more to keep taking this message wherever it’s needed. “You inspired us to have the confidence to connect and express ourselves.”
You might be one of those people. (Regardless of where you’ve lived) You can make a bigger difference in your everyday world. Please do. And enjoy the rewards of seeing your kind words and actions land well, and when you don’t see it – know that you make a bigger difference than you can imagine, and it’s never for nothing.
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Taking a step this week to connect with confidence?
Here’s a few small steps to help…
1. Start with a smile! Be ready to make eye contact with people around you, and think happy thoughts. Be in a good mood (whatever it takes, do a little dance, get a happy song in your head etc) so that your smile is not far away when there’s a moment to share it!
2. Look for the friendly face in a crowd.
3. Decide to be the friendly face in a crowd. (You’ll find others soon enough. You’ll also find others who are glad you’re there.)
4. Download some resources to accelerate your learning and insights and grow your world! There’s some really helpful stuff HERE
5. And if you want me to walk you through this Confidence Building journey for the next 8 weeks – check THIS OUT!
Have a beautiful week Connecting With Confidence!
Cheering you on,